Something Tight at Happy Ending
302 Broome St., nr. Forsyth St. 212-334-9676
Something Tight D.J.’s Timmy D and Telfar (who play a mix of Italo disco, nineties pop hits, and random gems) never advertise, which is why it has remained a raucous crowd of downtown fashion kids, artists, porn stars, sexy nerds, and Eastern Europeans. Upstairs you’ll find a straighter, but no less raucous, crowd. It takes place on the first, third (and fifth) Thursdays of every month, from 10 p.m. to 4 a.m., but the best time to be there is at 1 a.m., when everyone gets a freebie. Recent treats: McDonald’s cheeseburgers, shots of Britney’s “Purple Drank,” and Slim ’n’ Tipsies (vodka and Slim-Fast). Gross, but brilliant.
Best Dance Party
Competition breeds the best. If only one pizzeria existed in New York, of course, there’d be no real winning slice. Thankfully, we’ll never know what that sorry situation tastes like, since pizza—like dance parties, dog runs, and fried chicken—has to evolve upward here.


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